Microsoft Chief Research and Strategy Officer Craig Mundie recently demonstrated his exciting vision for the future by calling for a “driver’s licence” for internet users.

Mr. Mundie said: “If you want to drive a car you have to have a license to say that you are capable of driving a car, the car has to pass a test to say it is fit to drive and you have to have insurance.”

This is why I am sure that Mr. Mundie will begin implementing a license test for Microsoft Windows. You see, there are by some reports over 9 million “zombie” Windows machines disrupting internet use by relaying spam and spreading malware, and while Mr. Mundie may not be able to create an Internet Driver’s License, he is certainly in the position to promote a Microsoft Windows Driver’s License.

Mr. Mundie asserts that some authority needs be able to “organize the systematic quarantine of machines that are compromised.” Who is in a better position that Microsoft itself to require and verify the proper ability of potential Microsoft Windows users to be responsible, and in turn to deny that use if necessary?

Since it is in fact the use of Microsoft Windows that is directly responsible for the near-totality of compromised machines, and because I am sure that Mr. Mundie’s position is based solely on what is best for the internet at large, I can see no reason why he will not immediately began implementing a program to test and license Microsoft Windows users before allowing them to operate their own computers.

I applaud Mr. Mundie for recognizing the incredible and massive harm the use of his employer’s main product has inflicted on an international scale, and I look forward to a new dawn of end-user licensing, monitoring, and quarantining-only-when-truly-necessary-and-never-because-someone-is-saying-doing-or-reading-something-their-current-government-objects-to for Microsoft Windows users everywhere!